by Sarah Alexander, LCSW As a therapist, I’ve been sitting on the front lines of what feels like a mass trauma-response since 11/9 (which, you may have noticed, is 9/11 backwards which, itself, is a variation of the emergency call number 911). I am not here to debate whether or not an election should evoke […]
EMDR Therapy
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW I began practicing EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) therapy after taking the basic course through the EMDR Institute in 2015. It is a whole different kind of tool than the other ones in my therapeutic toolbox. In traditional talk therapy, we utilize discussion to access and work through memory, thoughts, and […]
The Function of Breakdown: the Acorn/Oak Tree Analogy
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW As you can imagine, therapists have a front-row seat to a lot of human suffering and breakdown within their office walls. People sometimes ask how I cope with all of that, how do I not take it home with me and feel overwhelmed and burdened by it? It’s because, mixed in […]
Working with Our Parts: the CEO Analogy
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW One of the more effective models I use in my practice comes from Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy, developed by Richard Schwartz, PhD. Working as a family therapist with bulimic women, there were many people in the room who all wanted the system to work, but they often had very different (even […]
Body Image: the “Loving Your Pet” Analogy
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW I love helping people explore issues around their body/weight/shape/size (I talk more about my approach in my post “The 180-Degree Difference”). In my experience working within this specialty for over a decade now, it doesn’t matter what a person’s weight, BMI, or clothing size is: virtually no one is happy with […]
The Gift of Letting Others Struggle: the Egg Hatching Analogy
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW I see a lot of good, tender-hearted people in my practice who have deep wells of sympathy (even empathy) for the people in their lives, which is all well-intentioned and good. Just like any well-intentioned and good thing, however, it can become unintentionally problematic in excess: for example, when living with […]
The 180-Degree Difference with Body/Weight/Food Issues
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW Most people who come to see me about weight issues believe that that their weight, food, or body is the problem: “If I could just [be my ideal weight, eat what I should, fix my metabolism, etc.], I would be better and my life would be so much easier.” Our society’s […]
The Physics of Self-Care: the Pitcher and Cups Analogy
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW Many people who come to see me put self-care at the bottom of their to-do list; something that they might get to after everything else is done. They do this, in part, out of a mistaken belief that self-care is selfish (see my Airplane Oxygen Mask post). I frequently use the […]
Airplane Oxygen Mask Analogy for Self-Care
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW When flight attendants give their pre-flight safety instructions, one of the things they tell you is that, in the case of a change in cabin pressure, be sure to place the resulting oxygen mask over your own face first before assisting anyone else, even your own children. This instruction flies strongly […]
Your Flight Instrument Panel for Navigating Shame
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW John F. Kenney Jr.’s fatal plane crash in 1999 made an impression on me. I was baffled by the speculation that he died flying nose-down into the ocean. Even in poor visibility, I didn’t understand how that could happen. Wouldn’t gravity tell him which way was up? It turns out that […]