by Sarah Alexander, LCSW I see a lot of good, tender-hearted people in my practice who have deep wells of sympathy (even empathy) for the people in their lives, which is all well-intentioned and good. Just like any well-intentioned and good thing, however, it can become unintentionally problematic in excess: for example, when living with […]
The 180-Degree Difference with Body/Weight/Food Issues
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW Most people who come to see me about weight issues believe that that their weight, food, or body is the problem: “If I could just [be my ideal weight, eat what I should, fix my metabolism, etc.], I would be better and my life would be so much easier.” Our society’s […]
The Physics of Self-Care: the Pitcher and Cups Analogy
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW Many people who come to see me put self-care at the bottom of their to-do list; something that they might get to after everything else is done. They do this, in part, out of a mistaken belief that self-care is selfish (see my Airplane Oxygen Mask post). I frequently use the […]
Airplane Oxygen Mask Analogy for Self-Care
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW When flight attendants give their pre-flight safety instructions, one of the things they tell you is that, in the case of a change in cabin pressure, be sure to place the resulting oxygen mask over your own face first before assisting anyone else, even your own children. This instruction flies strongly […]
Your Flight Instrument Panel for Navigating Shame
by Sarah Alexander, LCSW John F. Kenney Jr.’s fatal plane crash in 1999 made an impression on me. I was baffled by the speculation that he died flying nose-down into the ocean. Even in poor visibility, I didn’t understand how that could happen. Wouldn’t gravity tell him which way was up? It turns out that […]